Pursue your dreams, if you have any

The last couple of weeks have been busy, or well at least I have not prioritized writing. I have been sick, but I guess that have been because I do not have willpower to do anything. I feel a little exhausted, not due to school, but of life. I wish I had any goals in life. Something more than just experiencing the world and have a family. I want something more out of my life, I want to be something special and something that really matters. Every day I feel more and more lost in this big world, and I realize I am just an ant in an anthill. We are all just workers. We work and work, only so that we can live, but the truth is that if we become too obsessed with working, we are not really living. 

"To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all."

                                                                                              - Oscar Wilde

However, the fact that I feel the way I do, makes me only more stupid and even more like the rest of the world. What I want, and what I want out of life, is what probably most of the population of this world wants too. I think to myself that I am the only one to feel like this, but in reality there are so many others who think like that too. Just like when I think I have a great problem or something horrible happens to me, I think to myself that I am the only one to experience that and I feel so alone, but when I think about it, I am quite sure there is someone out there who is going through the same. Probably something even worse. My thoughts are selfish.

I wish I had an answer of what I want out of life. What is my goal, what is my point of living? Do I want to follow the status quo and end up like every other family, working from 9 to 5 at a company I do not really like? I do not know, and I wish I did. Everybody needs a dream to pursue.